Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
My vagina just clenched in fear
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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