the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize