omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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