theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Randomize
