I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize