No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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