why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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