ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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