Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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