So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
