that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Randomize
