Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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