He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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