I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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