and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
