I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
I don't think brook has ever known best
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
