What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
I understand Curling. That high.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
