We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
