Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
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