there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize