I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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