No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
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You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
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You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
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