escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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