Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I supernannyed him into submission
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize