Don't you send me to vm
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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