please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
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My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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