hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
