apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
