I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
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