talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
