You made me cry and you don't even care
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I need mimosas to revive my soul
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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