I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
