Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
God I need to hump something, right now.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
