Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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