you guys were way drunker than both of me
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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