I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
