hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Randomize
