My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
