Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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