Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day