ugly people sure do ruin things
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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