You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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