My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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