This is evicking siegelnvs
This is fucking ridiculous*
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.