K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
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He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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