Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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