If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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