Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
