I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
