Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Randomize
