Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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